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5 Tricks to Stop Tryout Stress

By Jessi Pierce, Special to Minnesota Hockey, 09/20/21, 1:45PM CDT

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The start of school signals not only the return of fall, friendly faces and homework. It is also a surefire reminder that hockey season is right around the corner.

With the arrival of another year on the ice (welcome back!) it means coaches, players and parents are also preparing for tryouts.

Mike Orn, District 10 Coach-in-Chief and assistant with the Anoka High School boys’ varsity team, knows that the word ‘tryout’ alone can trigger feelings of anxiety, worry and stress – and hopefully at least some excitement, too.

“Being nervous is very normal, in fact, it can be good,” said Orn. “It shows that you care and want to do it. It keeps you focused.”

Jitters are certainly a normal part of every tryout season. But what should you be focused on to perform your very best? And how can you calm your nerves to do just that? Orn shares his thoughts.

1. Do Your Homework (parents, this one’s for you)

“As parents, we love our kids, and we want them to measure up and be the best. That’s why it’s difficult to watch them being evaluated by a subjective process that we have no control over,” explained Orn, a father of four himself. “We also have social relationships at stake depending on what teams they land on.”

Orn notes that a lot of the worries parents have during tryout season can be deterred through educating themselves on the process of tryouts, which in youth hockey are more of an evaluation than a tryout since there are no cuts, and the development trajectory of players (i.e. the American Development Model).

“Emphasizing the objective is on ensuring players make the right teams, not necessarily the top teams can remind parents that skills develop on very different timelines,” he said. “There are always early developers and late bloomers. The focus for coaches is on long-term athlete development – helping players reach their full hockey potential – and most importantly, helping them retain a love for the game, regardless of when their competitive hockey career ends.”

2. Skills on Display

OK, but what skills are coaches looking at?

“As a coach, the most noticeable and important hockey skill at all levels is skating. This would include speed, agility, mobility, balance. Other important hockey skills are puck control, shooting, passing.

“Some intangible skills that are important include a player’s work ethic and compete level. Do they battle hard? Do they often win puck battles? Do they hustle to and from the bench on line changes? Also, hockey sense. Are they around the puck and the play? Do they anticipate where play is going? Do they see the ice, their teammates and opposing players and make good plays?”

3. A+ Attitude

In most tryouts, it is very clear which players are the most skilled and the least skilled. For the players in the middle, evaluators and coaches hone in on details to separate players, and off-ice character, effort and attitude often become difference making attributes in both positive and negative ways.  

“How does the player respond to theirs or their teammates’ mistakes? Do they display negative body language like hitting their stick against boards? Frustrated players never perform very well. Also, on-ice communication. Do they talk on the ice? Do they demand or want the puck? Coaches love this. It shows passion and that the player cares. It also provides energy and makes the game fun for everyone.”

4. Control What You Can Control 

“Players, focus on what you control: your attitude and effort, and make sure you enjoy the process and have fun! That is why you play the game of hockey.

“Parents, communicate this advice to your kids. Also, regardless of the outcome, never make excuses or criticize or blame others in front of your kids. You are inadvertently creating a victim mentality and not valuing the traits of personal responsibility or accountability.”

5. Know It’s Going to Be OK

It's never easy to handle the news that you maybe didn't make the team you wanted to. Now players (and parents) are forced to refocus the energy and efforts heading into a new season that might understandably begin with some disappointment.

“Humble yourself to prepare that it might happen, so you are not surprised by it. Find the positives. There are usually always teammates that you are excited to play with. You also are likely to be the better skilled player and leader on this team which you will play on.

“Tryouts can be stressful, but they do not have to be! It is important to remember why we have them, and that is to give kids the best possible environment to develop their skills, have success and enjoy their hockey season. One tryout does not determine a player’s hockey fate, it just shows where they are in the long-term development process at this point in time.”

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